Thursday, December 30, 2010

Drowning In a Sea of Coffee: The Student, the Warrior

I am drowning in a sea of coffee. Help me out or I will become a coffermaid.


According to Mijal Bitton, sleep is the result of coffee deprivation.

Something amazing that happens in Stern College is that the entire college stops sleeping during finals week. Libraries and the Beit Midrash are filled with studying humans at all times of the day and night. If not for the fact that the sun sets, one would not have the ability to differentiate between evening and morning.

One can see that it is finals at Stern by the fact that all the girls walk around with huge sacks under their eyes, arms shaking from the overdose of caffeine, Oreo cookie boxes everywhere. People need caffeine and sugar to pump that studying brain of theirs through overly long tedious hours and study routines. People read textbooks and cram three hundred pages of information into five hours of uninterrupted studying. This affects their mental well being and that is evident from just a glance at a Stern Student during Finals week.

Girls on average gain twenty three pounds in a week of finals (this was proven as a result of a study conducted in Yale University entitled: "Stern and the Final Obesity"), women are twice more likely to snap at professors, three times more likely to complain that the food in the cafeteria is not sufficient, and twelve times, no kidding twelve times more likely to lose their ability to walk in straight lines.

The student masters the material, prepares the sources, memorizes the arguments, and is finally ready to engage in battle, to demonstrate her control over the material. The student is the warrior; the subject is it’s prey.

The student stands outside the testing room, pen in hand, anticipation in heart, waiting impatiently for the doors to burst open, and for all the information contained within to flow freely.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Shadchanim or Shidduchim: The Wolf or The Lamb

Being Both: The Wolf and the Lamb


What do you prefer in a dating context: being set up or setting up others?

Image: http://www.forgottenword.org/

The fact that I am a single woman who is searching for her second half who has single friends makes me into the dialectic human being. I am a being which has two sides to it. I am the matchmaker and at the same time the dater. There are two forces raging within me: that of the Isha Hashadchanit, and that of the Isha Baparasha. Both constitute opposing sides of the dating spectrum, and both coexist within me creating the conflict which has no solution, the being that has no harmony. While the Isha Hashadchanit is active, imposing matches upon others, forcing people to go out, to give it another shot, to be forgiving of shortcomings, the Isha Baparasha is cautious. Because of her very essence she cannot be active, she must be passive. She must wait for the phone call, she must not initiate, she must only respond. The Isha Baparasha pays attention to the detail and is not likely to let flaws pass.

Putting the Rav’s euphemisms aside, and on a more practical note, I have been on both sides of the dating spectrum, and I still am. I have set up many friends, one successfully. One of my best friends who my brother and I together set up with a wonderful young man is getting married to him in a few short weeks. That gives me much Nachas and joy.

When I try to get friends to go on dates, I can get so pushy. I begin to defy logic, start talking Kabbalah, soul mates. In my own head though, I am still myself. I am still the rational girl that thinks with her mind and does things which make the most of sense.

When I am on the other side, however, I look upon the Shadchanim as aliens. What are they thinking setting me up with so and so? How could they say that outlook on life doesn’t matter? How could they…

By understanding the conflict better, I hope to come to a better understanding of the components of my existence and maybe, just maybe, have some mercy on the other side when in any role.

Snowy Days in New York City

There is almost nothing more pleasant than waking up on a Monday morning in New York City to find the entire city covered in a white blanket of snow, and find out that work is cancelled for the day. This is the type of thing that happens in movies, and yesterday it happened in real life.

Although I never had particular affections for snow before, something about the snow struck me as majestic and the adventurous child within me awoke and begged to set forth, to explore. Unable to resist my desires, I bundled up in many layers of sweaters, scarfs, hats, socks. I put on my warm boots. And when I thought I would not fit through the door anymore, I decided to go outside.

Stepping out cautiously into the white city, the sun blinded me. The color of the sky was so brilliantly clear, the weather so icy and cold. I started walking, or rather plowing through the snow. The streets were deserted. Stores were closed. I thought of what I must look like with all of those bundles covering me up.

I started laughing. Being outside, free, conquering the cold, being so bold—all of it made me so happy. I walked avenues until I found an open Starbucks. It was teeming with bold adventurers like myself who dared challenge the blizzard and stepped into the outdoors. Because we were all heroes, there was a tremendous sense of comradeship in the store, and despite the fact that there was only plain coffee available (only one person bothered to show up at work in Starbucks on that day), it was one of the most pleasant drinks I had in my entire life.

One of the cooler people this world has produced by the name of Adina Suberi captured the city in its most magnificent moments. She graciously allowed me to post them here.






Readers Critique

Image: http://coachkalpna.com/
Who would have thought that Thinking Jew Girl was being read all the way in faraway Russia? Well, a PhD from Moscow wrote to me asking why I constantly write about the similarities between Shidduchim and apartments. Can’t I write about the differences?!


To that I say: there is only one big difference between Shidduchim and Apartments. There is a time limit to finding an apartment.

This reader also happens to be extremely insightful and sent me a fascinating article which I would like to share with you. Click here to read it.

To be brutally honest, I shep tremendous nachas from comments be it criticism, questions or even compliments.

Monday, December 27, 2010

Culturally Speaking

I wrote this play.
Image: http://static.guim.co.uk/




Cast:
Rabbi of Keniss (Sephardic congregation)
David Congregant
King
Prince 1
Prince 2
Narrator

Background: Keniss setting on Friday Eve (Shabbat or right before). One can hear the last Kaddish chanted. Men are congregating after Friday night services, the Mechitza is visible in the background. David (a man in his middle ages) puts his Siddur away after completing the prayers. Before heading out, he approaches the Rabbi at the front of the Shul and kisses his hand.

David: Shabbat Shalom.
Rabbi [slaps him on the cheek]: Blessings my son, Shabbat Shalom. How are you?
David: Baruch Hashem, Yom Yom, life is good. My business is better than ever.
Rabbi: Your wife, your kids?
David: My wife is good... [David slows down... coughs, opens his mouth as if to say something, then changes his mind]
Rabbi: Your kids, how are they?
Silence
Rabbi: David, you have prayed here for twenty years, and I haven't seen you looking so concerned in a while.
David: Rabbi, It's my twenty-four year old, Joe.
Rabbi: Yes...
David: He is dating someone unfitting for him.
Rabbi: David, walk me home. I will tell you something.

David steps aside to allow other congregants to converse with the Rabbi.

Next Scene is Rabbi and David wearing coats walking out of the Keniss and down an empty, quiet, snowy, evening road.
They are seen talking from afar and camera zooms in in the middle of the conversation.

David: Joe met her at a communal evening event. He brought her home last week to visit the parents... [sigh] It's not that she's a bad girl. She isn't. She is sweet. She is smart. But she is different. She comes from an Ashkenazim family. I am nervous that the cultural differences will end up being too much of a barrier to cross. Joe is so in love, it is clear to anyone that he is not thinking with his head.

Rabbi: Do you have anything concrete you are basing this on.

David: Joe comes from a family where his father provided and his mother was a housewife. We raised him with certain values, with expectations. It is not respectful by us for a woman to go out and work if she does not have to. Talia, his girl, does not know of such things. She is in graduate school and is going to be a lawyer. She doesn't understand the importance of being at home to raise the kids like we do. She comes from a different world.

I keep on repeating this to Joe, but he does not listen. He says that he is more open, more modern.He says she will change. Once she has kids, he says, she will want to stay at home. Doesn't he understand that sons end up like their parents? That people do not change? Doesn't he understand that it will bother him when she will not accept her role as a traditional wife? Doesn't he!?

Rabbi strokes his beard in thought as they turn a corner.

Rabbi: Let me tell you a story. [flashback to a different time]
Once upon a time there was a king. The king had two sons. The king said to his sons.
[Imagery changes to a palace and king speaking to two sons]

King: My sons, you have grown to be wise men. It is time that you conquer the world. One of you shall go to the west, and one of you shall travel East.

Narrator (Rabbis voice) while imagery of ships and travels and different lands: The sons parted their ways and traveled and conquered different parts of the world.
When they returned back to the palace many years later they had been affected by their experiences. Despite the fact that they were of the same royal blood, there was the history of their lives that came between them.

Image of Rabbi and David walking again, approaching Rabbi's home.

Rabbi [opening the door to his house]: They are from one family, yet the cultural gap of many centuries comes between them.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Never Thought It Would Take This Long to Find an Apartment

What Apartments and Shidduchim Have in Common
Image: http://lh4.ggpht.com/

Apparently, life is never as easy as it seems. I approached apartment hunting the same way I approached shidduchim. Before I started, that is.
As a person graduating mid-year I had the challenge of searching to fill a spot in an apartment where most of the tenants are already settled. It was more difficult than I anticipated. I saw an ad online, called, arranged to see the apartment the next day.
I remembered hearing people complaining about apartments. How hard it was to find them, how difficult to decide on one, how to find the right roommates, how to negotiate the perfect price, the correct building, in the better neighborhood, by the preferred subway station.
This was all taken care of by me. The apartment seemed great. All I had to do was meet the roommates, see the place and sign the lease.
Well, Lo Haya Velo Nivra. Reality in fact was far from it. I went to see the apartment, and the girls. And to put it mildly. I could not live there. It has been a few weeks since then. I have contacted numerous potential roommate candidates since then, spoken with some, went to see many apartments, heard a great deal of advice... At least I know what questions to ask when I go to see apartments now.

I walked into one apartment and the young woman who was showing me around was extremely impatient. The apartment itself was nice: newly renovated building, tastefully furnished. She told me that they were forcing their present roommate out and that is why there was an opening. I asked why they were evacuating the apartment from the unwanted person. She informed me that the girl was extremely weird. When I asked for an example, she rolled her eyes and said: “She was extremely weird. Like, sometimes, she would sleep on the couch and sometimes, she would even open the windows!”
“Wow,” I thought to myself, never heard of anything as weird in my life. I would probably be forced out of the apartment within two minutes of living there.

Another apartment I went to see had awesome girls. That was the incentive. I came to see the apartment. What I saw was a living room which they offered me a part of to make my own room out of.
“And how exactly would I do that?” I asked. They told me it was my job to figure it out. An image came to my mind of myself standing in workers clothes full of paint trying to build a wall out of cement, sweat pouring down my forehead. Then another image of someone coming in the middle of the night and shifting my wall to make the living room bigger. Then I would wake up squashed between two walls. Additionally, the room had no lighting. With all due respect, I was searching to move into an apartment, not to build one for myself.

Then there was the realization. After having seen many apartments, I spoke with some girls about another room where I was informed of the fact that I had to buy a bed. Somehow, that information caught me completely by surprise and I ended up sobbing huge heart wrenching sobs in the middle of that apartment. What do you mean? Buy my own bed! I cannot do that!!! That is just too much.

It's funny that I approached shidduchim only a few years ago with the same mentality. I figured that I would avoid the picky craziness all those surrounding me spoiled themselves with and would marry the first guy I went out with. Yeah... that did not work out so well...

So, I am still searching... and I hope that someday I will figure those things out, find an apartment and all the things I long for....

Monday, December 20, 2010

Germany's Biggest Synagogue Reopens

Germany's biggest synagogue, on Rykestrasse inBerlin,has reopened after a lavish restoration.









The synagogue was set ablaze on Kristallnacht, or the Night of

Broken Glass, in 1938.

''

Friday's inauguration saw rabbis bringing the Torah to the synagogue,

in a ceremony witnessed by political leaders and Holocaust survivors from around the world



The synagogue, with a 1,200-person capacity, has been described

as one of the jewels ofGermany's Jewish community.



Rabbi Chaim Roswaski, who presided at the ceremony, described the

reconstruction as 'a miracle.'



Restoration of the neo-classical building,

which is more than 100 years old,cost

more than 45m euros ($60m, 30m).



The re-opening comes at the start of

a Jewish culture Festival in the capital.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Gone With The First Romance

Image: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/




I spoke with a friend about closet romantics. She asked me when I started dating seriously. My initial response was that I started dating approximately a year and a half ago.
And then I thought of Shragi. Shragi, the guy who was my boyfriend for many years. We started going out when I was three years old. I was not desperate at that point yet, I just had an open mind to meeting people and making friends. We met in kindergarden and became friends instantly. He was the best. He would sit there for hours being my model student and tolerating my impatience and explosions with love and interest. He filled any role I asked him to without complaints.
Shragi had orange hair that formed the most adorable curls on his head. He was skinny with skin as white as snow and freckles that threatened to cover his entire face when exposed to the sun. His mother was obsessed with suntan lotion and would shmear it all over his face despite protests. I just stood by the side and looked at Shragi with pity. Somehow, back then I knew that a good girl should not argue with her mother-in-law.
Our parents were friends, so on the days we had off from school, our families would have picnicks in public parks. While our parents would fold out blankets and lay them with all sorts of yummy foods, such as the chocolate bars we only received on special occasions, and the yummy sandwiches that were made out of the most delicious Shabbos leftovers, I would take Shragi's white hand and together we would walk for hours on end through the park discussing our lives, our future together, the home we were going to build and other wonderful things. We discussed the Parsha, the Midrashim the teacher told us, we laughed at how stupid Pharaoh must have felt when he took a sip of water and realized it was blood. We giggled together.
Sometimes, when we behaved nicely, we would be allowed to have sleepover parties. I loved them the most. Because then we never had to separate. I could just be with Shragi today and still be with him all the way into tomorrow, and then tomorrow we would go to kindergarden again so we were inseparable. His mother would read Curious George to us and would turn off the lights.
That was when all the fun began. That was when I would discuss my theories with Shragi. He wholeheartedly agreed with everything I said, because after all, it made perfect sense logically. My theory was that at the age of nineteen all girls become boys, and at the age of fourteen, boys become girls. I figured that this had to be true, because G-d could not have created a world where beings never got to try out what it is like being on the other side of humanity. Here are some of the details we developed in the long dark nights when all the parents of the world thought we were sleeping. Those who were born as girls were luckier because by the time they were transformed into men they already had a Brit Millah, while those who were born as boys had to go through the painful operation as newborns.
When Shragi doubted me on that one, because he was annoyed that I was the lucky one who did not have to go through the pain, I proved the authenticity of my side of the argument. Mora Batia taught us that one has a Bris Milah when he is eight days old. I made sure to ask specifically about nineteen, and was informed that people aren't given a Brit Millah at nineteen. Once I explained, Shragi understood. He always did. That is what I loved about him. The only difficulty with my theory was that between the age of fourteen and nineteen there was an overwhelming majority of female human beings on earth, since the boys already became girls, and the girls were still girls. The guys had somehow disappeared. The difficulty bothers me to this day.
When I was sick, Shragi came to my home and sat by my bed for hours reading me my favorite story about Sarah and her Glida. I sat next to him when he had a splinter in his foot and was scared of a needle penetrating his skin. Shragi was my best friend.

So where is this Shragi of yours today? You may ask...

Ah, well the story ended the summer I turned six years old. We graduated from kindergarden and spent the entire summer playing together. When the summer was over I went to school. Shragi went to Cheder. After the first day of school, I met up with Shragi and we went for a walk with our mothers around the lake. My mother was walking with his mother behind us and we were in front.
I was so excited. I told him about my teacher, about the fact that I was going to learn how to write and read, I told him that we counted all the way to a hundred. Shragi listened, but he did not seem happy at all. He was extremely quiet.
What's wrong, Shragi? I asked. How was Cheder?
Shragi told me that his Rebbi told him that he cannot talk to girls anymore. I was shocked.
But that does not apply to me, I argued, it cannot possibly, I am your best friend! I love you.
I was desperate for him to react but he did not. He had this empty look in his eyes.
So it's over. I half said, half asked.
Yeah, he said, I guess it's over.
And then I asked the inevitable. 
So you don't love me anymore? I was having difficulty comprehending this.
He looked at his feet and said. I don't love you anymore.
I wanted to cry, but I was a big girl, I was already six years old. And big girls don't cry.
That was the end of my first romance.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Meet Pray Love--Shidduchim and the Government


  • Published 03:12 09.12.10
  • Latest update 03:12 09.12.10

Meet, pray, love ... eventually

Lawmakers discuss later marriages among national religious camp.

By Jonathan Lis
In a city like Jerusalem, it's not easy to be a religious male who stays single past
his early 20s. His parents fret; matchmakers lose their patience; and worshippers
 in synagogues give him pointed looks. Katamon and Nahlaot, two neighborhoods
 filled with Orthodox singles, constitute the "big swamp" and the "little swamp."
Together with a desire to see the world, priorities for thousands of young single
religious men and women have changed - they are not in a hurry to start a family.
 Television channels in Israel have stopped ignoring this trend, and have devoted
to it special programs, like Yes' hit series "Srugim."
A meeting of the Habayit Hayehudi party this week in the Knesset reflected the
 trend, and the challenges it poses.
Slowly, religious singles filed into a small room, and tried to explain to the
 Knesset representatives why they aren't finding partners and getting married.
The MKs tried to figure out how they can reduce this growing trend in the
Orthodox community. Minister Daniel Hershkowitz got married at the age of 19.
 MK Zevulun Orlev was married at the age of 24, whereas former MK Nissan
Slomiansky waited to the ripe age of 26.
The trio tried to determine what is causing young people in their community
to pass the age of 30 without a beloved, though in the end they admitted a
quick-fix could not necessarily be found.
Orlev told the participants that while he married young, he has familiarity with
the phenomenon from his own family. "I have a son who got married at the
age of 30, and that seemed excessive to us. On the family level, it causes
pressure. I assume that single men and women feel this pressure, but the
 fact is that they stand up to it, because they get married very, very late.
 This is a trend which must be discussed."
Chaim Falk, chairman of Yashfe, a non profit for singles in the national
 religious community, said that his empirical investigations have yielded "truly alarming numbers."
"Being single is much more prevalent among males than females," he said.
In the national religious community today, he estimated, there are 31,000 unmarried males and 21,000 single women between the ages of 25-40.
Participants in the meeting cited a number of factors keeping the chuppah canopy folded away. First, marriage age is rising generally around the world, and so follows the national religious as they are exposed to Western culture. Second, whereas in the past Orthodox women married on average at the age of 19, today many are free to get married only at the age of 23, after they complete first degree studies. Males at that age are just finishing their army service or yeshiva studies; and such differences in their stations of life creates gaps.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

The Qumranian Woman

I am taking a fascinating class on the topic of Dead Sea Scrolls.
Below is an essay I wrote on the Women of Qumran.



Image: http://images.travelpod.com/
In the ancient sites of Qumran where thousands of scrolls were discovered over the span of the twentieth century that dated all the way back to a sect in the first century, there lies a story; a story of a sect, perhaps as many sects that lived in seclusion and isolation from the rest of the world, following their own self-proclaimed leader, following their own interpretation of the law, living by their own rules. Yet those people, so alone, proclaimed righteousness over the rest of the world. They viewed themselves as the small jug of oil that had to remain preserved in its pure state stored away in the lowest corner on earth, right by the Dead Sea, in the desert, in the village of Qumran. 

The finding of the scrolls stored in the caves of Qumran and the work of archeologists gave contemporary man insight into the lives of the people living in Qumran. The problem with speculating about people who lived over two thousand years earlier is that all one can have is merely speculations. The documents that are readable by humans today might have not been kept by all then, most items and carcasses of the people who lived there have disintegrated into the dust and air that disappeared without a trace. 

Were there women who lived in Qumran? Although this might sound as an odd question when heard at first, it is quite substantial based on certain evidence and findings. It is evident from the writings on the scrolls and of ancient historians such as Josephus, Pliny and Philo that the dwellers of Qumran were ascetics, who did not see value in physical pleasures, did not own property and according to some, did not own wives. Besides for the accounts of historians, the attitude towards women in the scrolls found near the Dead Sea seems to speak in a denigrating tone towards the female gender. Women are looked down upon as unworthy of trust, as despicable and adulterous creatures that were put into this world. In addition, the graves that were excavated at the main cemetery of Qumran, Chirbet Qumran, seem to be predominantly filled with male body remnants. Although some female carcasses were found along the margins of the cemetery, due to the fact that they were buried with jewelry, and to the fact that their carcasses are only approximately five hundred years old, historians assume that the female bodies once belonged to Bedouin women who have no practical connection to the Jews who lived at Qumran. From what archeologists found in terms of the public dining rooms, the libraries, the tight living courters, it would appear that the members of Qumran lived a communal lifestyle that was almost communist had Marx come a few years earlier, with a single sex population dwelling together in an ascetic life of supposed purity. 

Wonderful. It seems clear now that all the members of the Yahad sect living in Qumran were male chauvinist pigs, perhaps not the latter part, but there is definitely sufficient evidence for scholars to make a claim that women were not a part of the structure of the Yahad sect and that they did not reside in Qumran. 

If one is to accept the position mentioned above as fact that cannot be refuted, then there is no point in further discussion. Women were not present at Qumran, members of the Yahad sect never married women. And the means Yahad members used to keep their sect filled with live people would be by kidnapping, or kindly soliciting and collecting capable and appropriate young men from bigger cities. There is quite a strong possibility that their philosophy in life was: Why bother having children if others can have them for you?

Except for the Rule of the Community, every single document that was found regarding laws and rules of the community, i.e. the Damascus Covenant, the Rule of the Congregation, the Halachik Letter and the Temple scroll all included reference to women, or to family and seemed to include women within the larger picture of the community. Because of this, some scholars divide the dwellers of Qumran into the Yahad members, which would refer to the more stringent congregants and might be similar to the Priests in Catholicism who engage in a more ascetic lifestyle than the rest of their community, and that the other documents applied to a wider variety of smaller sects that were somehow connected to Yahad. They were the Essenes, perhaps, in contemporary terminology they could be referred to as Modern Yahadox. 
Jodi Magness takes the position that female presence in Qumran at the times of the Essenes was minimal: “…This evidence corresponds with that from the cemetery, which attests to the presence of women, but only very minimally.”
Dr. Lawrence Schiffmann gives a tremendous amount of attention to the way women were described in the scrolls, the laws that pertained to them. He uses the written letter of the law to learn about their day to day life, occupation, hobbies, marriages and places in society. 

The Damascus Document talks of celibacy as the ideal form of life: "But [emphasis on the but] if they live [in] camps according to the rule of the land, and take wives and beget children, then they shall walk according to the rule of the Torah." (Damascus Document 7; 9-6) The Damascus Document permits marriage, but only as a 'but', as an afterthought, as a second choice. If one stoops so low that he would have to take a wife, at least he should do so according to the laws of the Torah. 

Most of the Halachik reference to women is found in the sectarian texts in laws regarding menstrual cycles and therefore, women's purity and impurity, similarly to the mainstream Halachik texts of Pharisees. 

Since the Torah often uses masculine language to apply to the female inclusively, or in some cases even exclusively, as the law of not killing a calf with his mother on the same day is referred to as Oto Veet Bno, all written in the masculine. The writer of the Damascus document applies this concept to other areas of the Torah as well, including marrying ones aunt, and he prohibits women from marrying their uncles as well. Quite often, and as will be explained in more examples in this essay, the sectarians take on a most stringent take on the law, making it seem exceedingly difficult to fulfill. 

Just because the Damascus document applies laws of men to women, one shall not be carried away by the notion that the dwellers of Qumran were progressive thinkers who preempted feminism and women's lib. The truth is far from it. In fact, the roles of the women as described in the scrolls were extremely traditional. The woman's role is clearly defined as the mother, wife and in the best case scenario, the witness for virgin proof. Dr. Lawrence Schiffman emphasizes the role of the woman in Reclaiming, Chapter “Women in Scrolls”, page 143:
“The Qumran scrolls envisioned women in many guises—as wives, mothers, temptresses, and beautiful captives—and as possessing purity or impurity, wisdom or guile. The texts portray women variously as the embodiment of sexuality, the desired bride, the woman in childbirth. They mandate laws regulating women’s ritual purity. In all cases, we can see that women were very much a part of the lives of most Second Temple Men, who indeed expected to marry and build families. In the same way, I would argue, they were part of the life of the Dead Sea sect.”
In terms of family hierarchy, the mother is given respect. One who wrongs her is punished for ten days. However, the father is on higher pedestal than the mother since one who does not respect him is excommunicated for eternity and not a mere ten days. As the Manual Discipline of the Damascus Document writes: “Whoever complains about the fathers shall be expelled from the community and never return. And if he complains about the mothers, he shall be punished for ten days, because the mothers have no roqmah within the community.”
The entire judicial system, from judges to warriors was entirely in the hands of men. Women were not allowed in many public places and were not able to serve as judges. However, there was one “female” area of law, where they allowed a woman to serve as a witness. In a case of slander against a woman by a man that she is not virgin, women who understood the look of virginity would testify if the rumors are true or not. The life of the woman in question hung in their hands. 4Q159 in the Damascus Document describes these female witnesses as “trustworthy and knowledgeable women chosen by the word of the Overseer.” That is the only referral we have to women being involved in the public arena, and ironically, it is only in a case where a woman is defiled based on ‘female’ issues.  
From all the Mikvaot in Qumran and all the descriptions of the obsession Yahad members had with the laws of purity and impurity, one only has to imagine how hard they would come down on the women, who have impure discharges monthly and heavily after giving birth to their child. The Torah commands us to set aside impure people. Bamidbar 5:2-3 “And they shall send from the camp all those who are leprous, have discharges, or have become impure from contact with the dead. Man or woman, they shall be sent outside the camp; send them out that they not cause impurity to the camp, where I dwell in their midst.” Rabbinic interpretation commands that the impure are people of Metzora nature rather than the average person, while the dwellers of Qumran take the verse extremely literally, thereby making women leave secluded lifestyles on the outskirts of the city for at least half of their lifetime! “In every city, you shall set aside places for those afflicted with leprosy and with sores and with scabies so that they do not enter your cities and defile them; and also for those who have flux and for women in the time of their menstrual impurity or after childbirth, so that they do not defile in their midst with their menstrual impurity” (T.S 48:14–17). Not only did they make the mother move away as soon as she gave birth; they took her child away as well! Giving it to a nurse for feeding who was pure, so that the spiritual cleanliness of the baby is preserved: Damascus Covenant scrolls from Cave 4 (4Q226, 6, 2): “[she will] give the child to a pure nurse.”
Maimonides would probably be quite disappointed and misinterpreted if he heard a woman say this, however, I consider myself to be a Maimonidean thinker. I like to think that I live by the Shvil Hazahav, the golden mean. And therefore, I try not to take extreme positions on things in life unless it is an imminent matter of life and death. Considering the fact that my opinion on the women of Qumran will not change much in the world, nor will it affect anyone greatly, I do not feel a need to side with either side of the argument. I was not at Qumran two thousand years ago and therefore do not and cannot know for sure if women were part of the community at all and if they were what role they played. I think I am most comfortable with a position proposed by Dr. Lawrence Schiffman. He says that most men in Qumran were fathers and husbands, who possibly lived elsewhere. They came to Qumran as to a sort of Yeshiva, to commune, and spend time with other members of the sect. After time, they returned home to Jerusalem, or the Galilee, to their homes, wives and children and resumed a somewhat normal way of life. 

Bibliography
1)Aharon Shemesh, Qumran 
(http://jwa.org/encyclopedia/article/qumran)
2) Dr. Lawrence Schiffman, Reclaiming
http://scrolls.teachtorah.org/Schiffman%20-%20Women%20in%20Reclaiming.pdf
3) Jodi Magness, The Archeology of Qumran and the Dead Sea Scrolls, Chapter 8, Women and the cemetery at Qumran. 
http://scrolls.teachtorah.org/Magnes%20-%20Women.pdf

Conquer from Within & The Reality of Jihad




This clip is extremely powerful in representing the reality of the spread of radical Islam and their abuse of democracy for their ultimate goal of suppression of freedom in the world. 
What is your opinion on the matter?

Shidduchim and Midrashim




Below is a video which is an accurate and too funny but unfortunately true about Shidduchim.  
It isn't for no reason that the Gemara states that G-d has as difficult a time making Shidduchim as splitting the red sea. 


Below are two more funny videos made in the same style about varying views and approaches to Midrashei Chazal: