Update on agunah issue:
Someone defending Aharon Friedman keeps trying to comment on the blog anonymously full of venom in defense of Aharon's right to withhold a get, trying to get into the nitty gritty details of the divorce.
The reason I did not post them is because at this point the facts of the initial divorce are not relevant since any person who wants a get should get it regardless of the circumstances. If someone doesn't want to be married, the partner shouldn't hold him against his will. The get should never be used as a weapon.
At this point, the reason for divorce is irrelevant. The marriage has been dead for awhile and the issues of divorce details should be worked out separately for the benefit of all parties. The get is a separate issue and shouldn't be tied in to personal matters. The marriage is over. End it.
Ora was formed as an organization to fight get refusal.
If Aharon is unhappy with custody arrangements, he has the ability to deal with the issues in court on a legal basis. And issues can be dealt with after the get is given. He will always be the father of the child.
Tamar, however, does not have the ability to demand a get through the american court system. Therefore, she is chained to a dead marriage and is at the disposal of her husband's mercy.
Someone defending Aharon Friedman keeps trying to comment on the blog anonymously full of venom in defense of Aharon's right to withhold a get, trying to get into the nitty gritty details of the divorce.
The reason I did not post them is because at this point the facts of the initial divorce are not relevant since any person who wants a get should get it regardless of the circumstances. If someone doesn't want to be married, the partner shouldn't hold him against his will. The get should never be used as a weapon.
At this point, the reason for divorce is irrelevant. The marriage has been dead for awhile and the issues of divorce details should be worked out separately for the benefit of all parties. The get is a separate issue and shouldn't be tied in to personal matters. The marriage is over. End it.
Ora was formed as an organization to fight get refusal.
If Aharon is unhappy with custody arrangements, he has the ability to deal with the issues in court on a legal basis. And issues can be dealt with after the get is given. He will always be the father of the child.
Tamar, however, does not have the ability to demand a get through the american court system. Therefore, she is chained to a dead marriage and is at the disposal of her husband's mercy.
I completely agree.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I do emphathize on some level with ex-husbands who have gripes about custody etc, I hate seeing halacha viewed as a method of abuse.
If someone doesn't want to be married, the partner shouldn't hold him against his will. The get should never be used as a weapon.
ReplyDeleteBut the halacha is the way it is for a reason - that the man controls whether his wife can go free. I'm not opposed to changing halacha, but you and your Orthodox readership probably are.
I am not connected to either of the parties in the sad situation you describe.
A woman can also refuse a get- it is not just that the man control his wife.
DeleteThe point of a get is not for either party to blackmail the other.
That's a point that is often not mentioned, possibly because historically the man could always just take another wife so it was less of an issue. Empirically though, it seems like the issue is almost almost the man not giving the woman a Get.
DeleteIsn't there some sort of 'get law' that she can use to demand one?
ReplyDeleteIt's called the Halachic prenup. It only works if you sign it before the wedding, which most couples do not.
ReplyDeleteIt should be said that that the halachic prenup is a recent invention of the past 20 years or so to protect women, while it is a wonderful document and every couple should sign one before getting married, its not a "get law" in the sense that it has always existed to prevent situations like htis.
DeleteThe fact cannot be overemphasized that whatever this Aaron Friedman says, whatever reasons he uses to justify himself, he is in the wrong, because he is abusing the halakha, by imprisoning Tamar!
ReplyDeleteI was talking to someone who said that this Aharon was known for being "weird." If that calms your nerves about ending up with a closet pscho . . .
ReplyDeleteHarassing Dave Camp is a dumb thing to do. If as a result of this he g-d forbid loses the next election (and thereby affects republican control of the house) all y'all will have blood on your hands. Ahron should give a get but this isnt the right way to go about it.
ReplyDeletewhat makes you so sure everyone wants the republicans to be in control?
DeleteOh, not everyone does. Only the people who care about the country.
DeleteObviously the marriage has not been 'dead for awhile' and the he is not willing to be divorced.
ReplyDeleteSure, others can step in and say how they see it but Mr. Friedman is sticking to his stance.